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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Sweet Dreamz's LiveJournal:

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Friday, April 28th, 2006
10:11 am
I had these disturbing dreams last night: rattlesnakes
I'd be interested in any comments. Thank you.
Sweet Thoughts
Tuesday, February 17th, 2004
6:18 pm
*posted in _dreamit too*

I had the coolest dream! I dreamed that my boyfriend and I were an ice skating couple representing the USA in the Winter Olympics. And we were so GOOD! LOL. I had on this outfit like Wonder Woman's, and my guy wore a black shirt with an American flag on it and black pants. And we spun and danced and twirled and leaped across the ice like graceful swans, and when we were done, we got a standing ovation! And then, we won a gold medal! ^_^!
Sweet Thoughts
Wednesday, July 16th, 2003
1:12 pm
Life can be unbearable at times...
Last night I had this weird dream that I took a job as a waitress...

I took this an order from a girl who was sitting by herself and I had to ask her to repeat herself a couple of times cause I couldn't understand her. So I went to take the cook the order and I had to wait in a line of other waitresses. Then I went to the bathroom and I came back to the food being finished. I was told that I had to change my clothes, and I have a faint recolection that I was wearing a blue t-shirt and blue-jeans, but I walked into the room and was looking around for a white collared shirt when I realized that it looked exactly like the shirt I was wearing (at that point I was wearing a white collared t-shirt). And there were no black pants, I only wondered why I couldn't just wear the black pants I was already wearing?!?!??!! So I walked out and went to serve the food, But each type of food was on a different dish so I had to consolodate, I remember there being alot of beans, brown beans. Anyways, by the time I was done, the customer had left, I remember someone telling me as I lifted up the plate to take to her...So I set it down and went to take the orders of two girls who were sitting together...again I couldn't understand the girl who was ordering until she was like "we'll have #1,2,3,4,5,6 and 7" then the other girl commented and sounded slightly upset with "now there's no way I'm gonna get what I want" which I was slightly taken aback by...

you know that I have never worked as a waitress...all in all, I have no idea why I had that dream...a little odd, don't ya think?

Current Mood: crappy
Sweet Thoughts
Thursday, May 29th, 2003
10:58 am
drugs dreams sex alcohol
oh man...one thing I just started to remember from such a long time ago is nightmares. It feels so weird to think that before I used to have these horrible dreams about 70% of the time I slept, and usually I prefered it over being awake anyway. It's just that...I don't even remember most of my dreams anymore. Oh, talking about that, one thing I really hate...not being able to remember dreams. I mean, in a lot of cases before that was good since most of them were so traumatizing I would have killed myself from the accumulation of memories there, but sometimes there's something just really important...and you just can't remember them unless you write down something while you're half-asleep, which is really annoying since you usually can't remember enough from what you've written and the writing's so hard to read you can barely understand it anyway. There's some really weird dreams I can remember though...some of them more disturbing than others...

Kind of ironically I think most of the ones involving sex are much more disturbing than the other ones not because there's anything kinky or violent but just...I think kind of in the same way pornography kind of desensitizes you it's not really...something you should remember at the same time. and some dreams just don't really make any sense and other ones are so...scary.

I hate the feeling of running away in a dream because sometimes your leg gets shorter or you have a harder time doing things like even moving certain parts of your body...it's really weird. For some reason this seems to happen a lot with things like running away, hurrying or (kind of funny) sex. Which leads to another thing...I might be the only person here (sick enough to pass this way) but have you ever realized in a dream that you were in a dream so you try to find some random hot person in the dream to have sex with? I can remember like...2-digit number-worth amount of times doing this (sometimes it was difficult), although in a sort of sense I think because I was an in the closet gay I felt completely sexually unfulfilled so I took it all out on dreams...which is sort of sad. Actually, I was thinking a lot more about sex back then (which is kind of weird since I'm supposed to be more sexually "active" around this age)...

What was kind of weird was seeing dead people in dreams. Pretty much all of these were wih Shinjan, and all around the same year...(although I think I actually had one a couple months ago) but there were a lot of different things about it...like in some of them, he was alive earlier than dead after, oin others there was already the assumption that he was dead but he was really alive, or one of those come-back-alive type of things, or in some of the weirdest cases I knew (like knowing a book) that he would die later on (or in even some cases, that's what the default fate was and I would change it). There was a lot of different situations...like seeing him in a gymnasium from behind the seats or there was one with being in a flowergarden as well...there was a lot of weird dreams...I remember one particularily strange dream part (a different one) where there was a sort of carnival-ride type of theme ride (that goes about the speed of a ferris wheel) that ascends further and further down to hell. It was kind of funny, how regular the pattern was, but the "group" (or family, I think I actually had a slightly different family in that dream) was starting to notice it's probably a bad idea to go further down...and the whole thing was done in caves and the weirder thing was (along with the orange-red theme) was things like candies...it was just plain weird.

Then I also remember some tihngs like going through houses out of nowhere...or old buildings, you know what I'm saying? You don't even remember what the hell they were about but you remember like a 5-second scene. Or you remember what happened partially in a dream, but you don't remember the dream.

There was one really scary dream I had some time ago (but in the same year) which had like this black-robed mage which was just basically, a bunch of teeth with a robe. they were like...sideways and looked like giant (like arm-length long each) shark-like teeth made out of metal and jesus christ, that dream scared the shit out of me. but the weirdest scary part was when I "woke up" in my room in the dream, and I calmed down (I might've actually woken up, or fallen asleep again and appeared in my room in my dream) but like five seconds later this monster screamed to me soemthing really really loud and then I really woke up. It's really scary when you think a dream is over but then you think the second time it's real life.

Don't you ever have a dream or a part of a dream which seriously, seriously seemed like it was genuinely real life? I can't blame people for getting confused about real life and dreams and think about the horror of their life being a dream. but that'd be really weird because it'd be such a fucking long dream.

What about something like when you're half-awake and half-asleep? Sometimes (usually when I'm mentally masturbating) I'm in a sort of half-concious state where I'm still in the dream but I feel my blankets or something like that. Usually I only get that when (for some reason always) when I'm fantasizing about being fucked in the ass, it's not graphic or anything, I just get really horny or something about the idea of it and my pants get really wet. but then I'm almost like conciously masturbating but at the same time I can say that I really did have the asleep part in, it was totally different from the dazed-in-the-morning version.

Oh yeah, that's one thing that sort of bothers me about gay sex...like the involvement of pain in it...I mean, personally I wouldn't really care, and it would feel so good that it wouldn't even really matter but...a lot of the sexual pangs I get are almost slightly similar to pain but sometimes I wonder exactly how close erotic feelings are to pain. I mean like it might be a lot less for something like just hugging or kissing...but I guess it's because it's a release of feelings (of need), but if you can't release it isn't that pain? Isn't not being able to kiss someone pain? and isn't releasing all of that inside (literally) pain as well then? because it's a need.

Not to mention that there's forms of it that actually do involve pain...(although I think generally it's sort of detrimental to the sex, might just be me though)
Sweet Thoughts
Wednesday, April 23rd, 2003
11:34 am
new community for you people out there that like and want Icons and Blinkies


feel free to join and read the rules plzz!! thanxz
Sweet Thoughts
Saturday, April 12th, 2003
7:46 pm
Ok People I nedd a Hug!!!
i know this isnt the place to sya that but...yuh ok bye byez:(


Current Mood: sad
5 Thoughts Sweet Thoughts
Friday, April 4th, 2003
9:35 am
Columbia, scared of airplanes, wild rollercoaster and a midget named Chuck.
I had the weirdest dream of being on a a car and I was following a chasing car.And I was with a female friend and there on the car we were chasing.we finally got to be side to side with it.So I kill the leader and I get into the car and my partner(the girl) just dissapears and the other two guys are like "what happened to chuck" which was the leader.I didn't really kill him.....I knocked him of the pick-up truck and he got trampled on.So I stayed on the thing...and like we're in this really sick twisting roller coaster.And then to let us down....splash!It let us off in the water of a central park in Columbia.Well then I didn't know it was Columbia but it wqas some spanish place.And I'm with my female friend and then we run and see the house from Nightmare on Elm Street and the numbers in the movie are 1428 elm street....but on the house they are different so I open the door and it's all scary and my friend runs away.And I shut the door cuz just by looking inside it looked just how Nancy had it.SO then I meet up with oen guy and we're walking n crap and we bump into 3 guys that I saw before who were looking for me and him.We ran across so they wouldnt see us.But we ran back around the Kreuger house....and then we came to a dead end where he jumped in and bounced.Next thing I know I'm on a airplane back to NYC from Columbia(mind you i'm not columbian) and I was freaking out cuz there was turbulance and the airplane wasnt really an airplane...it was just fake And It felt like the floor could break apart in half.And we had to wear those water lifesjackets and I was all freaked out.And then I wished for us to land and there was a airport right ahead and we landed.One I didnt know it was columbia, but I knew cuz the pilot looked like my teacher who is Columbia..blonde n all.But she does look like most c9olumbian's do.OMG..and the ariport my ears popped but then it went away madd quick and I started singing Jessica Simpson's A Little Bit...dont ask me why but in my dream thet helped with the poppin....wow.On that airplane....I was scared.....it was like a nightmare I wouldnt wake up.I was shaking and the airplane moved and went from side to side,,,,, tilting...omg...I coulda swore I could of have had a heart attack.

Current Mood: weird
Sweet Thoughts
Thursday, April 3rd, 2003
8:07 pm
Hello everyone...I just want to say Hi to everyone and like to Introduce you to ur new Maintainer Liz aka Da LiZz-Ard...i am now happy to say that this community is mine thanxz to Benny = lost_and_alone6

If there is any new Ideas...thoughts...and or suggestions...i am more then happy to hear anything from you...with that i am out...take care everyone and when ever u want answers to some dreams just ask n posts and wha not and i will try my best to answer them...if u think u know wha they mean feel free to help out our fellow members ok? i love dreams and have read and studied many things about them...so enjoy!

-LiZz...dA LiZz-ArD

Current Mood: lazy
Sweet Thoughts
Tuesday, April 1st, 2003
9:25 pm
dreams-my last few dreams have been weird.First of all my self-image has changed.It is no longer half dragon half human....its black with a purple heart.I no longer feel strong in my dreams...i feel rather fragile....hurt.Another thing:the castle is whole...it was in ruins.And the weather has changed no longer red cloudy stormy skys......its sunny!!!!I have a theory:I'm subconsciously unhappy with myself....but i'm consciously happy or at least pretending to be happy.Perhaps i am happier with the world and unhappy with my attitude.Whatever this means its creeping me out.ender_dragon without the dragon would be what????Just ender?Perhaps this is my mind dealing with those tarot cards...the reading said i couldn't confront myself.

Current Mood: fragile
5 Thoughts Sweet Thoughts
Friday, March 21st, 2003
5:39 pm
Weird Dreams?
The other night I had this weird dream that the appointment lady at the hospital set up my next appointment with a male gynecologist and I started freaking out. How could they let a guy be a gynecologist? Then last night I had a dream that my friend was crying...I hope that she's okay because she wasn't the last time I saw her.
1 Thought Sweet Thoughts
Wednesday, March 19th, 2003
7:47 pm
Okay, this will probably be the first ime I'm posting here, but I've had some wierd dreams lately. If anybody can tell me what they might mean, I'd be grateful.

Okay, the first one is extremely odd. First off, my family and I are at what looks like Epcot. Now, I've had this dream before, so I thought "nothing new. I live through it. But, then I turned to this girl next to me and it looked like somebody I knew really well. (note that I am a girl and this "person" is also a girl). She then asks, "I want to know if its true. Are you really destined to be alone?" I told her yes, then asked why she asked. She simply said, "because of this." and then she kissed me. Next thing I knew, I fell in love with her. The next day (in my dream) I'm wakling down the road to a beach to a house. The scene looks like a scene I picture from the book "Silver on the Tree" written by Susan Cooper. Anyway, I knock on the door to this house and a girl answers. I ask if her husband is there, so she goes and gets him. When he comes, it looks identical to Zechs (from the anime Gundam Wing). I ask where his sister is and he points me up to a house on top of this hill. I bound up there. Its a house that's all glass, but has blinds like you would see on sliding glass doors surrounding it. I see a head poke out of the blinds, and its her. She opens the door when I get to it, we kiss, then I wake up to my alarm. *is confused* can anybody tell me what's going on?

And my second one is even wierder! There was that old guy from Gone in 60 Second, Heero Yuy (from Gundam wing), me, and a character from a book called "A Tale of Unfortunate Events" (Esme if anybody has read the series and knows who I'm talking about). Esme comes up to me and the old guy and demands to know what we are doing. The details are shaky coz I'd rather forget, but its been bugging me. But, the guy slides a paper off the esk to Heero, whoc tries to hide it. The old guy (why can't I remember his name?) says something stupid, then runs out the door. Esme says, "I see right throught this! Come back here and meet your doom!" (I had watch Tuck Everlasting the day before). She throws a knife and it hits him right between the eyes (but more on his forehead). The wierd part: there's no blood. No blood comes out of his head! Then, she turns on me and I wake up! But, that's not the wierdest part. I had been trying to pull myself out of my sleep since the guy ran out of the house. I could feel my body trying to get itself up, but my mind not moving. It was almost like I was frozen in my dream and it scare the crap out of me!

If anybody can help, please do. I'm a bit freaked out coz I rarely dream something like this...


Current Mood: confused
6 Thoughts Sweet Thoughts
Monday, March 3rd, 2003
1:40 pm
Ghosts in my dreams
In my dream I'm tormented by ghosts who refuse to leave me alone and be little me with whispered comments like "I know about you". The bad ghosts seem to show up and they want something from me, but they don't tell me what it is. I talk to my father and he tells me he knows a church I can hide out in where I'll be safe, I end up hanging out in this abandoned church with a homeless kid who is much younger than me. My dad tries to keep me calm and when I start seeing the ghosts again, my mother tells me she sees them as well. I end up in a graveyard with child ghosts who want to talk to me about how lonely they are. The child ghosts are good ghosts and say that i'm safe with them. The skies darken and then I wake up. I'm not sure what this means.. anyone?
Sweet Thoughts
Monday, February 17th, 2003
6:12 pm
My dream of losing my sister
My sister and I seem to be learning how to surf. We have a private instructor. First we make little purses (my impression of them) out of reeds to hold our lunches?!?!? crazy. Then we start walking along the beach to get our instructors board, we already have ours.

A giant wave comes. We aren't walking right next to the water, but next to a cliff that's a giant flat mirror. Looking up it I feel the same sense of awe that I do when I look up a cliff when walking along the coast in Capitola. When the giant tsunami hits us it slams us against the "mirror" then tries to suck us and our boards away out to sea. (This might come from my first experience boogie boarding where I had to remember to roll off my board before I hit the wall, if I didn't the wave would push me up against it and I felt like I had been body slammed, oh joy).

My sister and I lose our reed purses (I had the impression that both the instructor and my sister had been disgusted with the "style" of my "purse). We continue down the beach getting farther away from where we had started. Each time a wave comes my sister and I hide behide a rack of boardswith our bodies pressed against the mirror. I look over my shoulder and yell, "it's coming, it's coming...almost here" then I breath deep, hold my breath, then bam the wave hits. It is assumed that my sister is doing the same thing. The instructor is somehow always in the water and we think that it would take an expert to be able to survive being in the water when the big waves come. She is always alive...

Three gigantic waves come in the course of my dream and in the last one my sister is sucked out to sea by the under-toe. At first I tell her to hold onto her board. Then, when I see that it may be what's making it hard for her to come back to me I tell her to forget the board...

Current Mood: shaken
1 Thought Sweet Thoughts
Thursday, February 13th, 2003
12:52 pm
I'm new here and I was wondering if anyone who reads this could give me input on a dream I used to have as a child.
I haven't had it for at least twelve years, because I know I was very young then (I'm 18 now). I haven't had a nightmare ever since then, but the thought that this dream actually frightened me when I was little is kinda funny. This was the dream:
A little red bouncy ball in a white room, starting off bouncing around slowly but then bouncing faster and faster. The faster the ball bounced, the more frightened I became.
I don't have any nightmares now. I actually rarely dream (to my waking knowledge, anyways).
Anyone have any ideas on this, on what the dream may have meant? Thanks.

Current Mood: curious
Sweet Thoughts
Monday, February 10th, 2003
7:57 pm
HIYA! I'm a new member...I like the idea of a community for sharing dreams and such. I had a wierd one last night that my best friend and other friend joined rumline in band. The one that was on quads (that's those drums that have four in a row) is tiny! She couldn't even be able to support them! The other was on fifth base and she cant's upport it either! I have odd dreams.

I'll stop blabbing before I get to the one about the pirate ship chasing me through out a house and going through the walls without toughing water...



Current Mood: devious
Sweet Thoughts
Monday, February 3rd, 2003
10:54 am
Some disturbing dreams...
People for some reason don't like to talk about those types of dreams. Personally, I've had some fairly disturbing ones...bad dreams usually came in the surge of bad years, but I do recall back somewhere between 5-10 (probably 8) I had for at least a year, consecutively. That was a real pain...for some reason the whole halloween monsters around the house out to kill me really clicked in during that time, and there was a lot of doom cases being found hiding in the closet. Probably during 10-12 was the worse years though...my home life became periodically worse, and there was a lot of physical and mental fights. There was a lot of sad dreams...a lot of them had to do with death for some reason...like I recall a lot of cases which my mother, sister and myself ran away from something, there was a lot of assasination type of thing, and usually the frequent and worst situation was separation...there was a specific dream I partially recall where it was like that, and it looked somewhat like the future, although it's probably the easiest to compare to something like Tokyo night illuminated in red. There was a lot of negative views on technology, with all the computers being used in the dark with complicated symbols glowing in neon green.

That really wasn't disturbing, though. The disturbing cases was probably the hatred I had towards my father during this time. Maybe it was the physical punishments and restrictions, but these dreams always involved death. There was a common situation where I was running away from my dad who obviously had an express and intention to kill me, and while running away from him through the house, turning tables, chairs and such (when it got to the kitchen, which looks ironically more like the house we live in now than the one we did back then), and then it always had to eventually reach a dead end. When this happened, out of desperation I'd grab a chair and hit my dad over the head with a chair. Unfortunately since every time he would get up again with the exact same expression this would continue until he was dead (or unconcious, now that I think of it, but whatever way, in those dreams he was probably dead). Then I'd cry after that. Those dreams always seemed to have a theme of "helplessness" in them.

Dreams have a way of emotionally effecting you though, don't they? Like after a bad dream I always end up going to my sister's room and hugging for a while.

There was a colorful variety as well, some of them stranger than others...like there was one which I got my head chopped off, but I was watching it from a third-person perspective. Isn't that weird, when you don't realize that you're not even seeing the world from yourself in a dream?

Probably one of the more recent disturbing dream was a specific one which a tall creature covered with a dark-colored robe could only be seen inside as darkness with vertically lined rows of sharp teach portruding. Mind you, they were sharp, shined like metal, and were at least a head's length. The more disturbing aspect was that when I first woke up, I was so tired (from a lack of sleep) I fell asleep without realizing, and in my dream I was still in the same room. This was really, really scary when a rabid monster suddenly out of nowhere glomped me and started vibrating and saying "how can I help you?". Then I really did wake up after that, but probably what was scary was that it really did seem like real, so for the next hour I walked very slowly checking for monsters behind the door.

...which is something until about a year ago or so I've done more as a habit or anything. For some reason, I have this natural assumption that there's some random people out there to kill me, so I always check all parts of a room before fully entering it. This didn't go very far, usually it was only a check for someone behind the door and in darker areas. The superstition also was fueled by a strong conviction that there are ghosts in this world and there are several living in the house. Fortunately, I also believed that they were simply lonely and relatively harmless, so it didn't do much emotional damage.

Around 11 though, I started abusing dreams somewhat as a form of entertainment. I recall one specific time when I was little (somewhere under 10) which was for some reason, in the kitchen when we were eating macaroni cheese (don't ask why). Anyway, while in there I realized for some reason that I'm asleep, and I needed to wake up from the dream. So, I tried to open my eyes in the dream...for some reason, I still didn't wake up, then for some reason realized that my eyes in my dreams were stationed lower, and I moved my hands to somewhere around my forehead and opened up my eyes there. I actually did wake up in result, and physically, I did open my eyes with my hands. Something about the amount of self-control there was from dreams is still somewhat disturbing to me.

Anyway, back to abusing dreams. What occured at times was that frequently, I'd realize to some extent that I was dreaming. For some reason, sometimes it still didn't click in that I could control to some extent my dream, or for some reason I still treated it as real life. Probably the most common way I abused it was sexually. What's sort of funny is during this time I still considered myself straight even though obviously everything contradicted that. Anyway, since all of my wet dreams involved guys, it's sort of obvious (although of course I wouldn't admit it to the point which I would consider the idea ridiculous). Denial really is powerful. I've always had trouble with controlling dreams though, it always doesn't seem to go right. Usually the most frusterating case was when I tried uh, having fun in a dream things seemed to never go right. Like people melted or in worse cases mutated, or something else wrong happened. Like as soon as it starts getting good I'd sort of start feeling airheaded and I'd float around and the whole area would be engulfed in light, and usually I wake up.

...I always get pissed off when that happens.

I think the reason why it happens though, is because your brain can't create a scene in a dream on its own. What I mean is that it can only to some extent recreate something, so unless you've at least partially experienced it somewhat (or you're knowledgable) would it happen in a dream. For example, most (if not all) people wake up when they're killed in a dream.

Probably the worst dream period I've had though, is last year. About 2 years ago, my closest friend at the time committed suicide, and that really did knock things offcourse. Probably because I developed an obsession with suicide and such, my dreams pretty much revolved around the exact same type of theme. Which was pretty morbid, everything in it was based on death or past (like things that's already happened) coming back in the worst cases. Some of them were after death, others before death, some cases he actually died IN the dream. Oh, mind you, I wasn't in love with him, we were best friends. But during that period I had very few close friends so I suppose that's why the damage was so great.

Oh yeah, there was one specific strange dream I recall. It was in a world where everyone was confined into groups called 'mansions' which operated like a country. Basically, all the the normal outdoor facilities were simulated in these gigantic buildings. So there'd be things like football stadiums right inside the mansion. I do remember specifically going up to one of the higher floors to find much better conditions that looked like the outdoors on a peaceful day, and the people actually lived in regular-looking houses. Of course, as expected all the people I knew lived in the slums area of the mansion, although technically it was a school. There was a lot of physical pains like being beaten for when you don't do things correctly, but a lot of the great part was staying up late and talking with a group of friends. Oh, this reminds me of something. I seem to always think I'm white or something, since by default all the people in my dreams are white. Maybe it's just where I grew up. But then again, there's a lot of asians around as well. 'except I can't relate to the stereotypical asian as well. Anyway, back to the dream. It ended with something about this lady called Medusa and she was tricking everyone into some sort of plan of hers that made her leader. The dramatic end was with the lights shimmering from her with everyone's arms up high. I forget why, but something about this dream was really, really sad when I woke up. Maybe everyone died.

Wait a minute. There's something very strange with dreams. Why is it that some dreams seem to last for at least a week within the dream? You sleep for 1/3rd of a day. So has is a play of 2 weeks packed into something like that? Is it that time skips and you don't realize? Or is it that in the dream state the mind can use the time much more efficiently? Why is that?

Sometimes I wonder if it's better or worse if we could control dreams. The plays are fascinating but then on the other hand you could do anything you wanted to in a dream (good food, places you've wanted to go, fame, lust...). Then again, people would probably get lost in dreams like they do with video games.

and then again, some people don't dream at all.
Sweet Thoughts
Saturday, February 1st, 2003
2:40 pm
My friend Jesse killed himself on saturday....ummm... I had a dream someone else died......what does it mean?

Current Mood: Dorky
4 Thoughts Sweet Thoughts
Friday, January 24th, 2003
10:20 pm
I'm Falling...
When I go to sleep at night I usually have a "day dream" where I have some control over what I "dream" about, then right before I fall asleep I suddenly feel like I'm falling. My whole body shakes because it seems so real. Then I relax and go to sleep. Atleast I think I do because I can't remember anymore than that in the morning when I wake up. Does anyone know why this happens to me?
4 Thoughts Sweet Thoughts
2:58 pm
Just a funny odd dream for my first post.
I had fucked up dreams this morning. It started out with missy coming in to wake me up, my house was different though it looked ratty neglected like, I struggles to wake, she made me go to the store. I bought a snickers ice cream bar and I stole a runt the pink heart shape ones yummy. The my brother had a truck which was really big extended cab and bed he could not drive it worth a damn we were at our old house which had been torn down some time ago. My mother told me I had to move out they could not afford to keep me any longer, so I was packing my things my Barbie dolls (!they have been gone for years) and I was looking for things of mine they were all things from my childhood long lost throw away and forgotten, the basement was moldy it was never moldy as though things had not been touched here for a long time. I woke up confused and thinking I had to go to the basement at my moms and get my stuff when I remembered that house was torn down last summer…. then I hit the alarm the dream switched. It gets important here. Something odd I got out of a large vehicle a bus? Something like that and people with me we were all disappointed and scared we had (landed) in the wrong place the land was hardened lava type rock you could see how it had flowed and then hardened. I climbed up it looked around it was a wasteland. We stared our mission. I wrote a letter to someone dear and I left it hidden. This seemed like an earth but not earth there were some fields and dirt roads. Shacks and such. We were looking for survivors. And we were trying to live. We found some people and we put them in the bus we had like laser guns ..lol… all of the sudden we were attacked by aliens they looked like smegal exactly like him! And water killed them. We shoot at them with the guns but they did not help. Then the dark sky opened up and it began to rain they screamed in agony and we were taking cover in a big old barn. We had captured on who was furious. We had killed a bunch of babies with our lasers they reproduced at a fast rate some 200,000,00 in two years. He was quite pissed to have to start over again. We had him and we were digging for info as his companions screamed as they died in the rain. I don’t know that we got what we needed soon after that I woke up and decided I no longer wanted to sleep. I hate smegal and I hate aliens I cant kill dammnit.

Current Mood: amused
Sweet Thoughts
Tuesday, January 21st, 2003
5:28 pm
Night Terrors
Nightmares suck but night terrors are so much worse. For anyone who doesnt know, a night terror is where you are awake but still seeing the scary thing - kinda like hallucinating. And your autonomic nervous system is activated, which creates a "fight or flight" feeling, which is why some people sleep walk. It can also cause anxiety attacks - this happens to me.

I had one of these this morning, left me very shaken. I woke, but the room was distorted, proportions were all off. Like, I had my hand on my cats head, but he looked to be half way across the room. And as I looked toward the wall it was like a desert and I could see a Mynci coming after me. To which I thought, "if I just had a banana gun..." - weird. Anyways, that set off an anxiety attack, a panic attack. And as I tried to go back to sleep, instead of drifting to sleep I kept kinda blacking out. And I could feel my whole body feeling fuzzy, like there were sparks coming out from me. Finally I had to get up, heart pounding, scared and go sleep somewhere else.

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